Full Load: A Second Chance Romance Read online

  If she couldn’t stand the prospect of being around me for a few hours, maybe she wasn’t as over me as I thought she was.

  I opened the door, and the past blasted into me like a fucking tidal wave. There she stood, her hands clenched by her sides and her eyes cast to the ground. She couldn’t even meet my eyes. Hell, she couldn’t even look at me at all. She just stood there next to her sister, her eyes locked on the ground like it was some sort of lifeline for this bizarre situation.

  Damn Whitney. I bet she’d done this on purpose. She always used to pull shit like this in school.

  “Hello ladies,” I said in a long, slow drawl, dragging my eyes away from Annie to see Whitney, a smug little smile playing on her lips. Yep, she’d sure as hell done this on purpose.

  She tapped on her wrist and gave me the sweetest smile as could be. “It’s ten. Just wanted to see if you were ready for the big day.”

  The big day, she’d said. Like this was some kind of wedding or something. Hell, in her eyes, it probably was. Little did she know how truly pissed off Annie had made me by leaving the way she had. I wasn’t going to forgive her that easily, and if she kept eye-fucking the floor, that wasn’t going to change anytime soon.

  Whitney was a sweet girl, but she was going to get one hell of a wake-up call when this reunion didn’t go quite as she had planned.

  Did she think me and Annie would take one look at each other, jump into each other’s arms, and then ride off into the sunset?

  Fuck that.

  I deserved so much better than to be left with a fucking engagement ring in my pocket.

  “Sure thing, Whitney.” I grabbed my keys from the entrance table and shoved my feet into my work boots. When I was ready to go, they were both still standing there, Whitney smiling and Annie more like a popsicle stick than a girl.

  A beat passed with me looking at her and her still looking at the ground.

  “Hi, Annie,” I finally said. “Long time, no see.”

  Her face flooded with color, and she turned away. Actually turned her back on me like she had five years ago. That move sent a rush of anger through me. She’d left me, she hadn’t been in contact this whole time, and now she couldn’t even bring herself to be a reasonable human being?

  “Hello Axel,” she said, her voice cold and hard.

  Whitney frowned at her sister before shooting me an apologetic smile, but she wasn’t the one I needed an apology from. Fuck this noise. If I wasn’t a man of my word, I’d slam this door right in their faces and tell them to find some other sucker to help them move their furniture. But I was me, and I didn’t do that sort of thing.

  So, I’d just have to man up and get through this godforsaken day the best I could.

  8

  I couldn’t bring myself to look at Axel, and I could tell by the hard tone of his voice that it was pissing him off. But there were just too many bittersweet memories carved into his handsome face. It was all too much to bear, and being ten feet from him brought on so many painful reminders of what was once was. And why I’d left in the first place.

  That night. That horrible, horrible night. When both his and my parents had died.

  I’d seen the way he’d looked at me when we got the news. At the shock and the horror, all directed right into my face. For days after the accident, I could see the blame swirling in his eyes. And I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t stand the thought that every time he looked at me, he saw the product of what had caused their deaths.

  So, I left.

  Standing here now, it all came rushing back. All the love and devotion I’d felt toward this man. I’d thought I would spend the rest of my life with him, and instead, I’d spent my lonely hours curled up on the couch in a big city with nothing or no one to truly call my own. I’d landed the job of my dreams—an editorial position at a big-time publisher—but I’d never felt emptier. Like some essential piece of me had been carved out of my gut and lost somewhere along the way.

  And that piece was standing there before me.

  I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t acknowledge his existence without crumbling into a messy heap on the floor. And I couldn’t let him see how much it hurt me to be in his presence. I couldn’t let him see how wrong I knew I was to have left. He’d moved on, and I’d lost my chance to be with the only man I would ever truly love.

  So, I turned my back and blinked away the tears that had gathered in my eyes. Maybe if I pretended this was fine, then the pain would ease up.

  Maybe if I told myself enough times that I didn’t still love this man…

  A part of me couldn’t help but hope that he still felt the same as he had all those years ago. Maybe the girl from this morning hadn’t meant anything to him, not like I had.

  Maybe, maybe, maybe.

  His answer gave me all I needed to know.

  “Well, time for me and Whitney to head off,” he said in a voice that was harsh to my ears. “You’re welcome to stay here, Annie. We don’t need your help.”

  And then he pushed past me with such an intensity that it left me raw and aching, the tears coming back into my eyes. No, Axel did not still love me. He wasn’t happy to see me, and he sure as hell didn’t want me around.

  I turned to rush back to the house, but Whitney grabbed my arm tight in her hand. Her eyes flashed a warning, and she dropped her voice low so that Axel couldn’t hear her speak.

  “Don’t you dare run off now,” she whispered. “I need you, Annie. I’m not going over to that house all by myself. If he’s there, I’m going to need you by my side.”

  Tears swarmed in my eyes. “You’ll have Axel.”

  “Axel isn’t my sister. I like him and all, but he’s not exactly my best friend. I need you.”

  My sigh shook my whole body as I stared at the clear need in my sister’s eyes. This was why I’d come here. For her. “Didn’t you see how he just acted toward me?”

  “That’s just as much your fault as it was his. He said hi, and you responded how? By turning your back on him like a coldhearted you-know-what.” She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “My god, you two are going to be unbearable, aren’t you?”

  I couldn’t help but agree that she’d made a good point. I had turned my back on him, out of a pure instinct to protect myself from my emotions. But I could see how that would have pissed him off.

  “You’re the one who forced us to spend the day together,” I said to Whitney.

  “Damn straight,” she said, hooking her arm into mine. “I need his muscles, and I need your heart.”

  9

  Annie looked like a deer caught in the headlights, her mind torn between fight or flight. Her feet were halfway off the porch and pointed toward her old childhood home just as Whitney grabbed her arm. I pretended not to be watching out of the corner of my eye, but I couldn’t help myself. She was going to run from this just like she’d run from everything else. She hadn’t changed, even after five years.

  But Whitney said something to her, and Annie’s face went from chalk white to pink. And then Annie whispered back into her sister’s ear and smiled. The armor around my heart began to break. That fucking smile. It lit up the whole neighborhood, even with the sun blazing overhead.

  I’d missed that smile.

  I’d missed being the one to cause that smile in the first place.

  It took all my strength not to rush back over there and wrap her in my arms.

  After a few moments, the two of them made their way over to the truck and hopped up into the passenger seat. Whitney sat in the middle, sandwiched between me and Annie like that was going to stop the tension from bouncing around in the cabin.

  Taking a deep breath, I shook my head. This was going to be a long-ass day.

  Fifteen minutes later, I parked the truck in the driveway of Whitney’s old house. Derek stood on the front porch, using his hand to shield his eyes from the sun, watching as we all piled out of the cabin. It had been a long and awkward journey, Whitney babbling about her job as
a teacher while Annie sat there rigid in her seat.

  It had felt like we couldn’t get here soon enough, but now that we were all face-to-face with Derek, the tension only increased. Bakersville had a small population, and it was the kind of town where everyone knew everyone else’s business. Half the time, we knew what was going on with our neighbours even before they did. So, when something like this happened, gossip spread fast.

  Derek had cheated on Whitney with a woman the next town over. He’d thought that would keep people from finding out, but one of Whitney’s teacher friends had parents who lived in that town, and they happened to spot Derek with an unfamiliar woman late one night at the local dive bar.

  It hadn’t taken long after that for Whitney to find out, along with everyone else who lived in Bakersville.

  “Axel.” Derek shrugged his hands into his pockets and rolled back his shoulders, squaring his body like some kind of alpha asshole who wanted to intimidate us. What a dick.

  Slowly, I strode up the driveway, my boots crunching on gravel with a nonchalance that told this ass he had nothing on me. I’d used to think he was a decent guy, though he’d been one of those idiots in high school who liked to give wedgies to the freshmen beanpoles during their first week.

  But no decent guy goes and runs around behind his woman’s back.

  I stopped just in front of him but didn’t feel the need to puff out my chest or roll back the shoulders like some kind of peacock on display. I was all man without all that posturing, and I towered over him by at least five inches. My muscles had been sculpted in the gym, hours and hours spent making sure I was in peak physical condition. Life on the road was long and hard, and I had to sit on my ass most of the time. It made me work harder to be healthy, which meant that this puny asshole had nothing on me.

  “We’re going to need you to leave for a few hours while we pack up all of Whitney’s things,” I said in a low voice.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Annie staring at me intently. Finally, for fuck’s sake, she’d decided she could look at me. And I couldn’t help but feel a thrill of satisfaction that she was looking at me now, when I was telling this guy what was what.

  “Axel, buddy.” Derek’s lips curled into a weird grin. “This is my house, and I ain’t going nowhere.”

  “Listen.” I stepped closer, and Derek flinched. “Whitney’s been through a hell of a lot, and I think we both know whose fault that is. She wants to get her shit without having to look at your fucking face. If I have to make my point clearer, I will. Do you get my drift?”

  Derek flicked his gaze to Annie and Whitney, all the color in his face draining away. As much as he liked to come across as some big and tough guy, he knew that he stood no chance against me if it came down to it. I wasn’t really going to fight him, but he didn’t have to know that. If it got him the hell away from here so Whitney could load up her things in peace, that was all that mattered.

  “Fine,” he finally said. “But if you break any of my shit while I’m gone, I’ll sue you.”

  “Okay, buddy. Have a nice day.”

  10

  Axel was sexy as hell when he was like this. It wasn’t often that he felt the need to show other men just how much he oozed testosterone, but when he did, it was highly effective. He towered over Derek like some kind of Greek God, thick, strong, sculpted into perfection. Derek had puffed out his chest, but Axel didn’t need to do any of that. He was the tougher of the two without even trying.

  And despite myself, I watched every moment of their exchange, my hand pressed to my neck. God, he looked so damn good. So sexy. He was such a man. He always had been, but the years had made him even more rugged than he had been before. Every cell in my body ached to be near him, to feel those strong arms engulfing me.

  “Your man is pretty hot when he’s like this, isn’t he?” Whitney nudged her elbow into my side.

  “I swear to god, Whit, you’re completely insane.” I shook my head and dragged my eyes away from Axel. Whitney just stood there with a satisfied smirk on her face. “Why are you trying to play matchmaker? You know we’re never going to get back together.”

  “My love life is in complete shambles or haven’t you noticed,” she said with nod toward her ex. “It makes me feel a little less depressed thinking that I could help you fix yours.”

  “Mine is just fine, thank you very much.” The lie sounded ridiculous coming out of my mouth. I hadn’t had a date for months.

  “Bullshit,” Whitney said. “You’ve never been a good liar, and you haven’t gotten any better about it since the last time I saw you. I know you’re lonely up north. Maybe I think it’d be good for you to come back home and be with the only guy you’ve ever cared about.”

  “Whitney.” My heart panged. So this was what this was about. Whitney wanted me to move back home, and I couldn’t blame her one bit, not after what had happened with Derek. She wanted her sister by her side, and she thought the way to get me to stay was to push me and Axel back together, as impossible as it might be. “You know I have a job up there. A life. I can’t stay in Bakersville.”

  She turned to me then and placed her hands on my shoulders. “If you tell me, honestly, that you love your job, that you love your new life in the city, I’ll drop this.”

  We stared at each other for one long moment, my voice caught in my throat. It was such an easy thing to say, but for some reason, my throat closed up tight around the words. Whitney’s eyes were clear and knowing, and she had put a finger on something that I hadn’t even known myself. I wasn’t happy in the city. My dream job had turned out to be anything but. I might have landed an editorial position, but I hadn’t touched a manuscript in weeks. It was all social media updates and coffee runs.

  But even though I knew all this deep down in my gut, the stubbornness inside me wouldn’t let me admit it aloud, especially not with Axel walking back our way, his head inclined to the side as if he were listening to every word we said.

  “I’m happy.” My voice shuddered. “I’ve never been happier in my life.”

  11

  The thing about Annie Jackson was, she was a terrible fucking liar. And suddenly, Whitney’s actions all made sense. Annie was miserable in the city, in her job she’d said she always wanted. She’d just told her sister the opposite, of course, but the quaver in her voice spoke volumes more than her own words did.

  Good, I thought bitterly. Served her right for running out the way she did. Maybe next time someone was about to propose to her, she’d think twice about leaving them in a cloud of bitter smoke.

  But the thought of some other asshole proposing to her only made me feel ten times worse.

  A rumble overhead snapped me out of my daze, and I cleared my throat as I approached Annie and Whitney. Immediately, they both stopped talking.

  “Ladies,” I said in a slow drawl. “There’s a storm brewing. We best get as much packed into the truck as we can because I don’t think any of us want to be hauling your belongings around in a downpour.”

  “Thanks again for helping, Axel.” Whitney gave me a sweet smile. “Let’s get this party started.”

  Annie wrinkled her nose and strode past me without a word. Of all the nerve. Couldn’t she at least acknowledge my existence? I was going out on a fucking limb here for her and her sister, and while she’d look at me when she didn’t think I noticed, she refused to so much a blink my way when I stood right there in front of her, helping out her family like some kind of loser idiot.

  I’d had enough.

  “Annie Jackson.” She stopped still when she heard the edge in my voice. “It’s been five fucking years. Can’t you at least, I don’t know, look me in the eyes while I’m spending my entire day helping your family instead of working on my own goddamn business?”

  She flinched, but then she slowly turned to meet my gaze. Tears were threatening to spill, but I didn’t let them lessen my resolve. It was about fucking time I got my point across. I’d been dying to do it for so
long, and now that she was standing here before me, treating me like some kind of stranger she hated, I couldn’t hold back my words any longer.

  “Thank you for your help, Axel.” She looked pained just saying that, like it was some kind of hardship on her to thank me for my help.

  “Really Annie?” I threw up my hands and stalked past her. “It’s really that hard? You act like I’m the one who left you, not the other way around.”

  “It’s not that. It’s just…” She trailed off and glanced away again.

  “It’s just what?”

  She stayed silent, and a tear slipped down her cheek. Dammit. I hated to see her cry, even as mad as I was. But it didn’t change the facts. If we were both going to make it through this day, we needed to stay the hell away from each other.

  “You know what? Nevermind.” Overhead, thunder crashed. We needed to work fast or we were going to be stuck here. It was a long dirt road back to the main drag, and my truck tended not to like mud very much. “I’ll work on getting the furniture out to the truck. You two pack what you can. Just do it in another room. Away from me.”

  12

  Two hours later, we’d loaded up most of Whitney’s furniture. She didn’t have a whole lot that was solely hers. There were a few gorgeous pieces that she’d found in old antique shops over the years. They stood out from the generic items that Derek was left with.

  While Axel had carried things outside, I’d been regelated to the bedroom where I’d been throwing Whitney’s toiletries and clothes into suitcases and cardboard boxes. Apparently, my very presence was sending Axel over the edge.

  It was rare to see him that pissed off, and I could count the number of times on one hand. Once at a high school football game when Jimmy Wilson had tried to push me up against the wall despite my protestations. And once when I’d told him I was leaving Bakersville for good.